Why are people negative? It’s easy! Finding fault, explaining why something won’t work or can’t be done are the hallmarks of people who talk…but don’t do.

It’s no surprise in some respects why we evolve with an automatically negative or at the very least conservative attitude. From a young age, most children are subject to; “Don’t do that, be quiet, stop, shouldn’t be careful…” all negative words often delivered with good intent but no doubt program us with a cautious and in some cases negative outlook.

Negative ‘talk’ from others can influence how we act. Negative talk from within ‘controls’ the way we act. The best way to control negative talk from others is avoidance, or if that’s not possible, use selective ignorance…tune out when they start in with the “you can’t do that” or “that will never work”. Negative ’self talk’ however is much harder to avoid.

Self talk is affirmation. I said it, it must be true. This self belief process manifests in rationalizing our thoughts and actions at a much faster pace than any other form of input. Most people speak at about 120 to 140 words per minute but we are capable of talking to ourselves at something like 400 words per minute and we can do it anytime we want to… and sometimes when we don’t want to!

Consider your ’self talk’. Do you say to yourself, “I can’t stop smoking… loose weight…. make more money”? Do you tell yourself “I’m so untidy…”, “I’m tired…”, “I have no energy…”? These things maybe true but do you need to keep reminding yourself?

Most of this talk, like everything else we do is habit. Changing habits means changing the way do things. The one thing I’ve learned about working with computers for 30 years is that if you keep putting the same information in and you don’t change the program…. guess what? The same thing keeps coming out.

Withing ourselves we have to change the input…and as a result we change our program; That’s the wonder of the human brain. If you can manage to change your self talk to positive statements and affirmations that’s great, but at the very least; If you can’t be positive…be quiet. Stop telling yourself the wrong stuff so you can at least stay open to other influences.

Remember too, when you talk with or react to others, maintain the same philosophy; be positive…be quiet. If you don’t, your own negative self talk will be supported.

This blog post was motivated by those people I’ve encountered who, after hearing a suggestion, idea or concept will instantly, and I’m talking about mere seconds of thought will start to recite a list of reasons why something can’t be done, why it won’t work and how it’s been tried before and didn’t work then so it won’t work now. It’s easy!

Keep an open mind, hear ideas, at least consider possibilities and reasons why things might work or can be made to work, then, and only then offer and opinion. You will be surprised at the results.